hearing from God

so talk to me, people.

i have been pondering the idea of how God speaks to me for quite a while.

i want to share my rambling thoughts, and hear yours.

i have always heard about how much faith Abraham had since he just up and moved when God told him to. (obviously the rachelle standard version) but let's face it. if God spoke to me in a loud, booming voice saying..."rachelle, pack your suitcase and get in the car. I will tell you where to drive"

i think i would, right?

the difficulty i have, is getting in the car and going based on virtually nothing more than a feeling.

what is so confusing to me is deciphering what is God's voice, and what is rachelle's loud, overpowering voice (aka satan)

so here are my thoughts just gushing out all over the place in no particular order.

does God speak clearly today? and how do i know when it is God and when it is me?

when there is a "closed door", does that mean that God doesn't want me to do it, or does it mean that God wants me to push a little harder and open that darn door up??

see...i was brought up baptist. you know, the ones that believe that God only speaks quietly? like that if you are feeling emotional about something, that feeling is nothing more than a feeling, and will probably pass?

so what i am asking i guess is, does God even speak personally now?

if you have been reading my blog for any length of time, you will know that everything i believe to be true is from the Bible.

i do NOT, i repeat, DO NOT ever want to get to the point that i think there are only certain topics that the Bible relates to, and some things we just have to figure out on our own.

with that being said, i know the verse in John 10:27. "My sheep hear my voice (the NIV says listen to...interesting) and I know them and they follow me."

so. i am Jesus' sheep. i know that. so it says that i WILL hear His voice. but HOW??????

i just want your thoughts.

i don't want christian cliches. i don't.

i don't want your experiences.

i want GOD'S word, ya know? no offense, it's not that i am not interested in your stories, because i am. it's just that i really want to know, based on the Bible how i can hear God's voice.

i guess the thing that confuses me is the fact that the way people usually say they know is when they feel a peace. well. my heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked. couldn't my heart produce that feeling too??

i'm not talking about things that are sin issues, obviously. i am just talking about ministries...house purchases...things like that.

and i am not doubting God here, or questioning Him. that's what's bringing me to all these thoughts...the very fact that i DO NOT question Him!

i know that what He says is always true, so if He says i can hear His voice, then i know i CAN...i just want to make sure i am hearing the right voice.

i want to grow.

i make it my goal to please Jesus, and i make no apologies for that.

so let me have it. give me your thoughts.

mel's house

we had a great time at mel's. enjoyed some time on the patio...











and then uncle chad took the boys to a field nearby, and they had a great time getting very DIRTY playing soccer!!

i love my sissy!!!

family + family...but still missing family...

me, my mom and the boys piled into the car sunday afternoon, and headed for new jersey. we were planning to stay with my sister mel for a few nights, and help her with the finishing touches of the nursery. i was going to then drive down to south jersey and visit my friend lindsay. even though ron and bobbi only live a few hours from mel, it would just be too hectic to drive all over the place and see everyone.

we got to mel's at around 9pm, and when we came in the living room, RON AND BOBBI AND LILLA WERE THERE!!!! i couldn't believe it! they had decided to make the trip, just so we could see each other for a few hours. it was so amazing, and we had a really great time.

problem. one sibling missing :( we sure did miss erika!!!

thank you for making such a huge effort to see us!! we so appreciated it!!

friends...for life.

i have some things to update, and i will get to that. but for now, i was able to meet up with my old roomy from Liberty who i haven't seen since last year. i don't think we would've guessed all those years ago, that we would still be such close friends. we were only able to be together for about 4 hours, but it was well worth it. here's a few highlights.
i love you linds!!

cute shoot

my good friend, natalya wanted some pictures of her beautiful children.
here's a few that we got..

my boys aren't little anymore...

as i have been thinking about different posing ideas for the upcoming shoot i will have once my sister has her baby, i have realized something.
once your kids get to a certain age, everything changes.
for example.
while taking pictures of a baby's feet is precious, it would not be so cute to do the same shot of my 9-year-old's!
i do enjoy looking at other people's blogs, and usually the ones that get the "wow's" are the ones that have little kiddies doing just adorable and delicious things.
you know, a little scrunched up nose, a naked baby, a little boy wearing his daddy's shoes. and as much as i love them, i don't think i'll be asking my boys to pose that way anymore!! haha...i'm sure YOU appreciate that too! :)

i can remember SO clearly my days that were filled with diaper changes, bottles and sippy cups. i really do miss those days sometimes. i can remember just saying over and over to myself, ok rachelle...once they are 3 and 5, your life will be so easy!! ok. when they are 4 and 6, your life will be so easy!

all of a sudden, i am having a conversation with a baby boy who is standing in front of me, looking me almost right in the eyes!! it's crazy. how does this happen?

i love every different stage, and i love this one. 7 and 9.

just yesterday, out of the blue...aj says. "mom? you're the best girl to ever step on land"


and last night, at 1:00 in the morning, after i had put riley back to bed. (he had woken up with a bad dream.) he got BACK out of bed, came into my bedroom and said
"mommy, i hope your back feels better" and hugged me and rubbed my back.


so thankful that God has allowed me to care for these little boys who absolutely melt my heart with everything they say and do.

flashlight

Imagine being alone in a dark room, trying to find your way to the door. You don't really have anything to help you...well, you do have a flashlight in your pocket. BUT- getting it out, and turning it on - UGH! i get exhausted just thinking about all that work just to SEE!
I'd rather crawl around and struggle. I'm sure I'll find the door eventually - come on!
Obviously, you would say - That's foolish! Just turn the flashlight on!
But...that is so many times what I do, and if you're honest so do you! (at least I hope so, then I don't feel so bad!)
Psalm 119:130 says "The unfolding of your words gives light..." How many times do we say - oh I am just too tired to open God's Word today. I'll just find my way eventually!
Think of how much easier my day would go if I used my flashlight in this dark world!

It would be foolish to not use your flashlight to find your way.

It is foolish to not read God's Word to find your way as well!
Let the Light of God's Words guide you today! You can't afford not to!

short version of alton bay day 5

alton bay day 4

last night melanie and chad got here! my boys love having them around, and i LOVE being with my mel!

alton bay day 3

aj tries water skiing

we found out when we got here, that the campground offers free youth water skiing. i mentioned it to aj, honestly thinking that he would have no desire to do it. he said he thought he might.

we got up at 7:00 yesterday morning, for the 7:15 start time, and he said he didn't think he wanted to. i was fine with it, and told him that if we wanted, we could just walk over and watch the kids who were doing it.

so we did.

after watching, i thought for sure he wouldn't want to. it looked a little intimidating, if you ask me.

so last night, as i was putting him to bed, i said that i wasn't going to wake him up, but if he got up and still wanted to go, i would take him.

he got up at 6:45...(ugh)

so i took him.

he only tried it a couple of times, but he said he really liked it, and wants to try again when they do it on friday.

i was so proud of him for even going out there and trying!!

here's a little video of him trying it out

videos

adam bought me this super cool video camera last year for my birthday...



i love it so much!!

so here are a couple of videos for you to enjoy



and my parents, showing off their mad dancing skills - still in love after 36 years!

alton bay day 2

in an effort to not complain, i haven't talked much about the back pain that i am suffering with. it has been about 4 weeks that i have been having a lot of pain, sometimes even to the point that i can't get out of bed. could you pray for me if you think of it? i just don't know what i am supposed to do, and i need wisdom to know what to do next. thank you so much. i love that i have friends that i can count on for that!