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Wednesday, December 07, 2011

your holiday, your husband and your happiness

So it's the Christmas season.
It's that time of year when schedules get crazy, finances get tight and relationships tend to get...
strained.

You know what I'm talking about.

It's supposed to be the time when everyone is smiling and happy, drinking hot cocoa and sitting in front of the christmas tree reminiscing of all the years of happy memories while listening to Frank Sinatra, right?

Here's the thing.

You have to know what kind of obstacles are going to be in front of you so you can be prepared to fight them.
And a big obstacle right now? Is keeping our marriages strong!

It's no secret that marriages are under attack right now.
I think one of the biggest problems that we have, starts out as
a good thing!

Putting your kids first!


Doesn't that sound so...
self-sacrificial?
loving?
thoughtful?

But here's the problem.

It's the wrong first focus!

I've talked about this before, but we all have the following relationships in our lives:

*Parents

*Husband

*Children

Two of these relationships are designed to be temporary
One of these relationships is designed to be permanent


We were designed to grow with our parents, and then eventually get married and move out.
We were designed to marry our husband and stay with him forever.
We were designed to have children and raise them to eventually move out.

But, what happens in our every day lives, is our kids can tend to take over.
We have to get them up, feed them, clean up after them, bring them to this game, and that party.
It can take over.
Then...whatever we have left at the end of a long day (which may be NOTHING) we put into our husbands.

The ONLY relationship that is supposed to be permanent


See how that is all wrong?

I am encouraging you this Christmas season, to just stop for a minute.
Ok. Maybe a few minutes.

And just refocus

Maybe you have forgotten what your role as a wife is.
I wrote about that here, last christmas!

Don't let yourself fall into the trap that is lying to you and telling you that everyone's marriage is struggling...
and this is just the way it is going to have to be.
Don't settle for less than what God has for you!

It is not the way it has to be!


While you're refocusing, remind yourself that you do not have rights that deserve to be met
that you do not need to spend more time taking care of yourself...
see.
That is also part of the trap!

The book of Proverbs tells us that only by pride comes contention
gulp.

Is there contention in your marriage right now?
Is there stress that you are getting overwhelmed with?

Put your pride aside.
Get a friend you can trust who will be consistent to pray for you.

Start enjoying your marriage the way God intended it!

It may be super hard the first couple of steps, but it will get easier and easier,
and your life will be better as a result of it!

So go and make some hot cocoa,
put on the Sinatra and ask your husband to snuggle in front of the tree with you.
Work hard on that permanent relationship!

Make this holiday be the best one your marriage has ever had.
It can start with you, and it will be totally worth it.

2 comments:

  1. you are such a great writer Rachelle!! this is an awesome reminder, hubby and I don't have kids yet, but when we do one day I still want to keep my marriage a priority :)

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