fighting mommy guilt

i have talked to so many mom's lately.
stay at home moms, working moms, single moms, married moms...
and i am hearing the same issue in every single conversation.

guilt.

that horrible feeling in the pit of your stomach when...

you see that pile of laundry sitting on the floor for days.
you see your kids reacting the wrong way and you feel responsible.
you read all these stupid blogs of all these "super moms" and feel like - how do they have it all together and i can barely remember to have milk in the fridge.

and in case you are not a mom and are thinking you can check out now...don't worry.
you can feel guilt over anything.
dude. i am the queen of guilt. and i am not proud of that, but i really am.
i will be eating ice cream, and with each bite be saying...i should not be eating this.
i go grocery shopping, put something in the cart and think...i should not be buying this.
i can't even enjoy half of what i do because of the stinking rotten guilt!

ok. so we've all been there, right? (please say yes!)
i started wondering what this whole guilt thing was all about.
i mean..is it sin? is it something i have control over?

here are my thoughts on it.
guilt is a feeling. a feeling that comes in. and just sits there. and festers.
it doesn't really go anywhere.  it only makes you feel horrible.

then there is another feeling we can have that is similar, but it actually serves a purpose.
it's called conviction.
conviction is also a feeling. but it is a feeling that comes in. and it drives you to action.
it drives you to God...to a place where you apologize for something you've done wrong and you make it right. then you move on. it frees you.

one thing to remember is that we have an enemy who loves to make us feel guilty.
revelation 12 says that he makes accusations against us to God day and night.
did you know that??
wow. that is pretty intense, right?
it's like seriously? i think God can pretty much see everything i'm doing wrong here without any help! jeez!

when we start feeling guilty, we are thinking of...guess who?
ourselves. yep. it's basically a form of pride, although we can almost pin it as humility!
ya know...i am such a bad mom, i am so lazy, i am such a failure. and on and on.
and in reality? who are we even comparing ourselves to?
(because seriously. i have seen some pretty horrible moms. haha! i joke. the answer to this problem is not comparing yourself to worse moms!)

so here's my break-it-down portion of this post.
and congrats if you have hung with me this long!

the next time you start to feel guilty.
ask yourself.
am i sinning?
is there something that i am doing, or have done wrong that is making me feel this way?
if there is, then ask God to forgive you (He promises he will)
ask forgiveness of the person if it is necessary.
and accept God's forgiveness... realize that He sees you as clean and forgiven.
and keep going!

(*little side note. ask yourself specifics. sometimes i think i can brush off my own sin by accident. like...i do not think i am a lazy person. but. i think i can be lazy in certain areas. so i need to ask myself for example..when it comes to homeschooling, am i being lazy there? do i need to put more effort in that area?)

if you aren't sinning? then you better realize that is a trap and a trick to get you down!
see it as just a FEELING and just push that annoying, destructive, deceptive thought right the heck out of your mind!

i mean for real..am i right here?!? so yes i do have control over it! how freeing!
instead of spending my morning thinking about what a failure i am, which actually drives me to...
my computer. or chocolate...which in turn makes me feel fat...which then makes me feel depressed. and on and on the cycle goes.
i can start focusing my mind on what God wants me to do today.
on the people and things that are in my life right now.
and i can move forward. and that in turn makes me feel peace. and joy. and happiness!
i like those feelings much better!
i love seeing who i am as God sees me.
and when i see myself the way God sees me?
it motivates me.
it motivates me to be better.
to be more loving. more forgiving.
less critical. less cynical.

let's all try for a guilt-free day tomorrow. sound like a plan?
i mean, who even has time for that junk anyways?

*chapter of the week. psalm 119.
it's long, but you can break it up...it is so. so. good.